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Sunday 4 December 2011

Funny Things My Brother Said #4

C: Laura, you need to choose between all these guys you fancy! I mean, there's Russell Brand, Matt Smith...
Granddad: Oooh Laura, who's Matt Smith? Is he your friend?
C: No Granddad, he's the doctor. But anyway Laura, you fancy everyone!
Me: There's a difference between 'fancying everyone' and finding celebrities attractive. You fancy people you know in real life.
C: Well you know, one of these days you might drop a load of paper on the floor and somebody good looking might bend down to help you pick them all up...and you'll fall in love! 

Me: Little legs can sit behind granny in the car. 
C: You can't call ANYONE little legs!
Me: That's why I said it, while I still can.
C: In a couple of years, when I'm taller than you, I'm going to call you little legs. And everyone will think I'm sixteen and you're 12. Then I'll ALWAYS sit in the front. Hahahahaaaaaaa!

C: OHMYGOD LAURA, Mark Wright is going out with Emily Scott!
Me: Er...who and who?
C: Mark Wright from TOWIE and Emily Scott! Don't you watch I'm a Celebrity?!

Funny Things Jason Said
Today we went to Blackpool and I met my cousin's little boy, Jason, for the first time. He's three and he's absolutely GORGEOUS. I fell in love straight away and he sat on the couch and talked my ear off for a while...

J: Can you take the skin off my toast? 
Me: The skin? You mean the crust?
J: Yeah, the skin!
Me: OK, but do you know that the crust makes your hair curly? You should eat it!
J: *Thinks for a second, stroking his hair* My hair's good. Can you take the skin off? 

J: I don't like sharks! They're scary! Do you like sharks?
Me: No!
J: WHY NOT?! 
Me: Because they're scary?
J: Yeah, they are really scary.

J: Do you like biscuits? 
Me: Yeeeaahhh I do.
J: Have one then.
Me: I'll have them ALL!
J: No, you can't have them all! That would be really cheeky!
Me: I know, and greedy!
J: Yeah, greedy. And when we go to get some, there wouldn't be any left!

Playing hide and seek with my brother. 
J: Caweeerrnnn....why haven't you found me yet?! Come and find me now! 

J: The grinch doesn't like Christmas! He's really ticklish!
Me: Are you ticklish like the grinch?
J: Yeah I am, but I don't have big hairy hands like the grinch!